Aunt Theresa
There are a few people that Bianca and I knew and wish that Peanut could meet. Nunni, obviously, was one of those people. Another would be Bianca's Aunt Theresa.
How to explain Aunt Theresa...geez it is very hard. Here is one way: Have you ever been to a restaurant or another excursion with a celebrity? You know, where you are part of their entourage and everyone is having a good time, the waitstaff is tripping over themselves to help you, and there is almost gravitational pull towards having fun? That was what it was like to do anything with Theresa. She was a celebrity. She had natural charisma that seemed to pull everyone towards her and her giving and kind spirit was their reward for allowing themselves to be caught in her charming undertow.
I first met her when Bianca and I were touring schools in Boston for graduate school. Bianca had applied to MIT and we were walking around the campus. We were looking for a building and a professor walked by. He was definitely trying to keep to himself, but Theresa grabbed him. At first he was shocked but slowly her laugh and smile melted his hesitation. In a few minutes he was making grand gestures as he pointed to famous buildings, all the while laboring under the delusion that I was the student seeking admission. When he told that to Theresa she quickly and definitively let him know that that is not the case. In fact, he learned all of Bianca's great attributes in a few scant seconds.
Theresa made absolutely everything fun. Boring things were fun. Fun things were ecstatic. When her brother Mike came in to town one time we all went to Legal Seafood. It was, honest to God, like a commercial. People were laughing, enjoying their food (and their neighbors), and Theresa made sure everyone had fun. People at other tables would, at first, be put out by the noise, but then they would come over, perhaps, to say something, and then stay to join in the bacchanalia. The waitstaff loved her. She treated them with such respect, no one, ever was beneath her. No one, ever, was treated poorly. And only mean people ever saw her wrath, and only after every other person on earth would have stuffed them in a garbage can and rolled it down a bumpy hill.
I imagine what she would say to Bianca and I if we told her about Peanut. She would shout "OH MY GOD", then her hands would go up in the air, then she would swoop down and hug both of us. Then she would stand back and get a tear in her eye and tell us what great parents we would be. Then she would put her hand on Bianca's tummy and talk to Peanut. There may be an impromptu trip to Babies R Us, like right then and there (why wait? life's too short). She would sneak a private moment and tell me that I am going to be a great Dad and remind me that she remembers when Bianca was a baby.
And this is the thing about Aunt Theresa, something that I wish Peanut could have experienced, she made the most of everything. She gave literally everything to anyone who needed it. Even at the very end, when we visited her in the hospital, she was trying to make others comfortable. Theresa understood with certainty many things that others spend years trying to discover. She knew, and I wish Peanut could have learned it from her, that, paradoxically, giving is the best way to receive happiness. She knew that life, even a second, even a trip to the grocery, is too precious to waste. She knew that family and friends were the most important thing. And she knew that your worth as a person is not in what you have or what you can do, but how you treat people--everyone.
It is sad that Peanut will never meet her, but hopefully those of us that knew her, including many who knew her better than me, can help us teach Peanut the lessons of her life.
How to explain Aunt Theresa...geez it is very hard. Here is one way: Have you ever been to a restaurant or another excursion with a celebrity? You know, where you are part of their entourage and everyone is having a good time, the waitstaff is tripping over themselves to help you, and there is almost gravitational pull towards having fun? That was what it was like to do anything with Theresa. She was a celebrity. She had natural charisma that seemed to pull everyone towards her and her giving and kind spirit was their reward for allowing themselves to be caught in her charming undertow.
I first met her when Bianca and I were touring schools in Boston for graduate school. Bianca had applied to MIT and we were walking around the campus. We were looking for a building and a professor walked by. He was definitely trying to keep to himself, but Theresa grabbed him. At first he was shocked but slowly her laugh and smile melted his hesitation. In a few minutes he was making grand gestures as he pointed to famous buildings, all the while laboring under the delusion that I was the student seeking admission. When he told that to Theresa she quickly and definitively let him know that that is not the case. In fact, he learned all of Bianca's great attributes in a few scant seconds.
Theresa made absolutely everything fun. Boring things were fun. Fun things were ecstatic. When her brother Mike came in to town one time we all went to Legal Seafood. It was, honest to God, like a commercial. People were laughing, enjoying their food (and their neighbors), and Theresa made sure everyone had fun. People at other tables would, at first, be put out by the noise, but then they would come over, perhaps, to say something, and then stay to join in the bacchanalia. The waitstaff loved her. She treated them with such respect, no one, ever was beneath her. No one, ever, was treated poorly. And only mean people ever saw her wrath, and only after every other person on earth would have stuffed them in a garbage can and rolled it down a bumpy hill.
I imagine what she would say to Bianca and I if we told her about Peanut. She would shout "OH MY GOD", then her hands would go up in the air, then she would swoop down and hug both of us. Then she would stand back and get a tear in her eye and tell us what great parents we would be. Then she would put her hand on Bianca's tummy and talk to Peanut. There may be an impromptu trip to Babies R Us, like right then and there (why wait? life's too short). She would sneak a private moment and tell me that I am going to be a great Dad and remind me that she remembers when Bianca was a baby.
And this is the thing about Aunt Theresa, something that I wish Peanut could have experienced, she made the most of everything. She gave literally everything to anyone who needed it. Even at the very end, when we visited her in the hospital, she was trying to make others comfortable. Theresa understood with certainty many things that others spend years trying to discover. She knew, and I wish Peanut could have learned it from her, that, paradoxically, giving is the best way to receive happiness. She knew that life, even a second, even a trip to the grocery, is too precious to waste. She knew that family and friends were the most important thing. And she knew that your worth as a person is not in what you have or what you can do, but how you treat people--everyone.
It is sad that Peanut will never meet her, but hopefully those of us that knew her, including many who knew her better than me, can help us teach Peanut the lessons of her life.